Thurgood Marshall is rolling over in his grave.
The new season of Survivor, a show I never watch (because who wants to see a bunch of dirty, ugly people - possible exception: Ethan Zohn and his Amazing JewFro - learn how to cope without indoor plumbing and TGI Fridays? I'm not at all curious about what would happen if I couldn't use my straightening iron and I firmly believe 20 million people can be wrong), presents you (again, you, not me), the viewer, with a BRAND NEW GIMMICK that will KNOCK YOUR SOCKS OFF! Contestants will be split into four groups!! According to race/ethnicity!!!
Yay!!!! Racial sub-grouping sounds like fun!!!!! I can't wait to see what happens!!!!!!
In a New York Times article, the series producer, Mark "Touched by Roma Downey" Burnett, chats about the show's wacky new format. "I'm not an idiot...I really don’t believe there are many people who hate each other because of their race."*
In rationalizing this load of crap that I would be forced to swallow if, again, I actually watched this tripe, this guy (if he is indeed, ladies and gentlemen, an actual man)** takes a page from the 'they-do-it-so-why-can't-we?' school of thought (and "it-is-what-it-is" ideology, which is mostly just a crappy cop-out for not having to explain yourself in a hailstorm of public outcry). In addition to touting his belief in the virtual extinction of prejudice and racism in our modern society, the King of Race Relations raises, as evidence of the tendency of people to divide their personal lives along "social and ethnic" lines, "areas like Little Afghanistan" in New York.
Well, color me impressed (no pun intended). It appears I was wrong about "Separate But Equal" Burnett. He must be an astute, experienced observer of human nature and interactions to so accurately reflect the microcosms of society in his forthcoming enlightened programming. And he is S-M-R-T. Gosh, who would have thought New York, of all places, had pockets of fairly homogenous ethnic groups? And if that happens in New York, it must happen everywhere. I bet that the separation of New Yorkers, and by extension, of course, everyone else, along class and color lines is totally their choice too...I wonder if they have him teaching classes at the CBS Diversity Institute. If not, he should. He's, like, got such a, like, grasp, on what the public is, like, thinking and feeling and experiencing. Especially, like, you know, black people and Hispanics and stuff.
It turns out that "We Are the World" Burnett probably doesn't like me as much as I don't like his show or the potential recipe for disaster that usually is television attempting to address social inequities and/or stereotypes. Because I have it all WRONG. My big mistake, according to "Black Like Me" Burnett, is that I don't 'get' the premise of the show. I can't seem to get it through my big, fat gourd that "[B]y putting people in tribes, they clearly have to get rid of people of their own ethnicity. So that's not racial at all." OMG! I totally get it now. You're soooooo right, it's totally NOT racial.
The change in format seems ostensibly due to criticism of the show's lack of diversity. Apparently, according to Marky-Mark and the Nappy Bunch, a whopping 80% of Survivor applicants are white. Umm...(look of confusion, hand slowly raised in the air), am I supposed to be surprised by this information? I'm not one of those people who normally says "Well, I have a lot of black [gay, etc.] friends," but...I have a lot of black friends and I'll bet you ten dollars that if I asked any one of them if they would ever try out for Survivor, they would look at me like "Are you serious? No way! That shit's crazy (read: for white folks)!"
But maybe that just me being racial.
*Note: While the actual words themselves have not been altered, the chronology of Mr. Burnett's statements has, in order to make him sound like an idiot. Which he does pretty well all by his ownsome.
**He is (as far as I know). I just wanted to join the sensationalism party. I like to be included in stuff. Especially parties. With open bars.
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